NOTE: At the end of this post, I'll tell you the rules for my Fathers Day 2018 Contest: The winner will get to choose between two field-level tickets to a regular season Yankees game in the Bronx (date TBA, travel not included) or a $1,000 donation to your father's favorite charity.
My father died when I was eleven, and was in and out of my life before that, so I don't have too many solid memories of him.
And while I was super close with my mother, I never felt like I knew "the whole story" with her. I think my mom operated under the "I didn’t want to tell you because you weren’t ready" mentality, and we never quite got there.
In anticipation of Father's Day, I've been thinking a lot about what being a father means to me, and a big part of it is sharing as much of my life as possible with my two kids.
This meant bringing them to work as much as was possible (and realistic) while they were growing up, and it also meant letting them have a voice in where we'd go on vacation, or to eat - or any of our family plans, for that matter. And it's meant being open with my children emotionally (within reason of course).
Being a father has also meant passing on "life lessons." I've always emphasized three "golden rules" with my kids:
1. Be a good person to everyone.
2. Be a good brother and son with your family.
3. Do your best in school.
Those were our only "non-negotiable" rules. We drilled them into our kids very early on.
And it's very satisfying to see what generous adults they've become, what good sports they are at all times.
But being a father is not just about how I "parent" my kids; it's also about how they influence me!
My kids, in addition to my wife, serve as my accountability police.
They keep me honest by goofing on me what seems like all of the time. They help me to not take myself too seriously.
It’s good to have people who know you and are completely open and honest with you. Who can critique you.
My daughter often calls me out when I tell her a story: "I can't believe you said that to that person!" (She also helps me dress sometimes.)
For me, the bottom line is that being a father is about more than the love I have for my kids: It's the teaching that only my my wife and I can provide them - and it's the learning that we can only get from them.
FATHERS DAY 2018 CONTEST RULES:
1. Subscribe to this blog by entering your email address > HERE <. (If you're already subscribed, you can skip this step.)
2. Leave a comment in the comments section below, telling me what being a father - or having a father - means to you. If you're reading this from your email, click > HERE < to go to the full blog page on my website and you can leave your comments below.
NO PURCHASE NECESSARY! CONTEST CLOSES AT 12:01 AM, EASTERN STANDARD TIME, JUNE 18th, 2018.
CONTEST RULES: By entering your comment, you are agreeing to the following Official Rules: Must be US resident; Must enter by leaving comment in comments section of this post; I retain the right to publicize the names and likenesses of the winner(s); If winner forfeits or does not claim the prize, it will be re-awarded, at my discretion. VOID WHERE PROHIBITED BY LAW.
Song of the Day: "Father And Daughter" by Paul Simon
A modern dad to me is someone who is present. Who takes the time, in a busy world, to focus on being in the moment and also preparing their child for the future. Who takes care of himself, physically and mentally, in addition to taking care of his kids. Isn’t perfect so isn’t afraid to ask for help. Holds kids accountable while being flexible and approachable. A listener not a dictator. A teacher, a coach and a source of love, strength and support.
Being a Father on Father’s Day for me is a day of reflection. I think about my successes, failures, and emotional moments I have been through with my children. At the end of each Father’s Day, as I drift off to sleep, I have a smile on my face, because , all though my children are not with me, our memories are….
My father died when i was 3 and even though I was only 3 i can remember him singing to me all the time .It really botherd me as i grew older to why i didn’t have a dad like the other kids to watch me in my school play or sitting there cheering me on at my wrestling matches. It was hard for me.Today though i am a proud father of 5 beautiful children 3.girls and 2 boys. I learned that not having a dad has given me a more meaningful bond with my children there not just my children there my friends i got to watch them take their 1st step to be there for them when they fell and watch them grow older into who they are today. Being a father is being able to share their world and to be there when they needed something big or something small.Being a father is guiding them in the right path so they can grow into reposible adults so they to can 1 day tell me Dad i am who I am because of you.
I currently do not have children of my own, but the meaning of a father is very special to me. My father is a loving/caring man who works hard every day to pay the bills, keep everyone in the house well fed and well dressed, and without my dad, I wouldn’t have the chance to be typing this email today. Father’s will always be there for you no matter what relationship you have with them. I love my father so much so it would be a great accomplishment in my life to sit down with him and watch a baseball game!
Having a father meant a lot to me. He taught me how to cook. He was there for me when I needed him and loved me unconditionally.