Two Things I Learned from My Dad

When I was younger one of the few things I did with my Dad was we went bowling. My parents were divorced by the time I was 4 and my father passed away when I was 11, and while my father and I did very little otherwise, bowling had become our regular thing.

We went to bowl in a place where if a red pin came up and you got a strike you would win a free Cherry Coke. This was huge for me and my focus was very high. 

What I realized was that with a lot of focus and complete attention, you could accomplish a lot. Spa Bowl on Coney Island Avenue and King’s Highway taught me a lot.

If you stay ready you don’t have to get ready. When that red pin came up I was focused on the task at hand.

The second thing I learned is that you can always hit the reset button. My dad would do what he called the “Double Fence.” Back in the day, of course, you used to write your own bowling score. If we bowled two bad frames in a row, he would write in two thick lines with his pencil on the score sheet around the bad frames. Clean slate. New beginning. The ability to start over is very underrated.

Sometime you have to draw a double fence. Maybe it’s a bad sales day, or a player has a bad shooting night…the point is that you can’t let what happened yesterday affect you tomorrow.

So, when I encounter a roadblock, or something doesn’t go my way, I “draw double fence.” Even though things haven’t gone your way, they always can moving forward. 

Don't live for the past, live for the future. Always remember, your best days are not your yesterdays.


  • My son lost his dad at age 11 also due to his suicide. I worry that I haven’t done enough to raise him to reach his full potential.

    Marisue on

  • This is a great advice and timely for me. Thank you!

    Susan Page on

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