I was listening to Thomas Dexter "T. D." Jakes, Sr., the Apostle/Bishop of The Potter's House and he was talking about how sometimes relationships don't "match-up.”
He says that sometimes we may be a 10-gallon person when it comes to a relationship, yet the people we deal with sometimes only have the capacity of a single pint.
Some people might not have as much of a capacity as you, but they can still be giving all they have (Love, work, attention, friendship, etc.). Not enough people understand that. Instead, they think that if someone has less than their own capacity, that something must be wrong with that person.
The biggest mistake you can make is thinking that someone should be able to match the level of commitment you have to something. Look, I’ve been in my business for 27 years- are there things my employees and I think differently about? Of course! But do I try to change that? Of course not! Same goes for any relationship. Whether it’s with relatives, co-workers, your spouse or just any person you meet, everyone has a different set of priorities. Not everyone has the same appetite. Not everyone has the same ability to see or feel things on your level, or rather, in the way you want them.
Everyone's ceiling or threshold is different and the ability to do what you want simply might not be in them. But, that doesn't mean they are not trying. Of course, that also doesn't mean you have to stay with them if their ability to give X, Y and Z doesn't meet your expectation level and isn't getting you what you need.
But in reality, not everyone should be held to the same expectations. Making an “unbalanced” relationship work could sometimes be a key to success. As a manager, understand that in the workplace not everyone should be treated the same, but that everyone should be treated fairly
What I have learned over the years is it doesn't have to be all or nothing. Sometimes there isn’t a “what-else” and there isn’t a “what’s next.” In reality, when reaching their full capacities, people are sometimes going to be on a different level. You have to love and appreciate someone for what they have the ability to give.
Or, maybe the relationship you're in just isn't for you?